I'm not doing a meme

There's that ten things meme going around. I don't do memes much, so I'm not doing this one, though it has been fun to read. But it did make me think of the neat things in life I have seen or done, moments or events that bubble up when I think of the best moments in my life. Not in the sense that "I did it and you probably didn't," just…. neat things. Whether they were famous people or not in any of these doesn't matter, so I'm not pointing that out as a "thing."
<lj-cut text="My list o' things">

<li>The glow worms in a deep, acoustically beautiful cave in New Zealand</li>
<li>Making love on the bow of a 30 ft. catamaran off the coast of Baja, Mexico, the waters swirling with bioluminescence</li>
<li>Canyoning in Switzerland (this is when you get in a wetsuit, and life vest), and make your way down a river/waterfalls/rapids with just your body floating/jumping, swimming (was I nuts?)</li>
<li>Feeling the warm air on skin while riding completely naked on a bicycle beneath the moon in the desert. Ditto that for a dirt bike.</li>

<li>Being so in love and lust and physical wanting for someone that it hurt enough to scrape fingernail marks in walls</li>
<li>Having that love consumated</li>
<li>The deep blue of glaciers and the starkly beautiful landscape of Alaska</li>
<li>Going into a true trance, no drugs, just thoughts going far enough to shift perception and feeling</li>
<li>writing "finis" at the end of a completed, full-length manuscript</li>

<li>planting a seed and seeing it grow</li>
<li>the feeling of the first night alone at college</li>
<li>The limbo of leaving home on a plane bound for California, belonging to neither coast</li>
<li>The taste of cheap white wine at 3 am on an overnight train to Paris, the bottle split with a wonderful friend and travel partner</li>
<li>Visiting a country that doesn't speak one's native language, in this case, Tahiti, and being able to communicate successfully in another</li>

<li>the experience of a whirlwind romance, 3 day romance with a stranger in a strange land</li>
<li>Feeling strong connections with eyes staring back at you, and both of you being completely comfortable with acknowledging and reveling in it.</li>
<li>The wind through the pines in Upper Saranac Lake, NY</li>
<li>The feel of a 40 ft yacht completely under one's own command as you catch the wind</li>

<li>finding beauty in overlooked, everyday objects</li>
<li>awareness of traveling through life's rituals, like marriage. Being aware of the process as it happened</li>
<li>Sunday, sunny mornings in San Francisco</li>



DLJ left a bottle of wine open he uncorked last night. I didn't notice it as I cleaned the dishes after making and eating dinner. So I saw it this morning. Bummer, I hate that, it was a decent bottle and now it was a pretty expensive 2 small glasses he had, and 1/2 glass I had. Our last winestopper broke too, which is why it was uncorked, it broke when he took it out to get a second glass, and then he never corked it with the one from the bottle, or whatever. Perfect excuse for me to get some unfinished wine stoppers and make my own glass tops! Not that I have the time right now to work on that, other things to do.
Really want to get a straight edge. Maybe I will go to the local hardware store this weekend and see what they've got. With all my other attempts to live better, going to local smaller stores for items that are pretty common will have to be one of the things I try to incorporate more. Which means no Home Depot for a straight edge, for example. Works for me. I've been using just a leftover slice of drywall as my straight edge since October, but without a ruler to go along with it for measurements…it won't work when I make my first small dish in the kiln. I just can't be freeform with that, not as I learn, anyway.
I ordered our copper fire pit yesterday, as well as a compost crock for the kitchen, a place to put the scraps weekly before transferring them to the compost pile in a larger chunk.
There's local demonstration gardens, I found out yesterday, to show you how to compost, using the kind of composter our fine friends let us have since they were not using it. We are looking forward to visiting one this weekend or next. Also, we might take the Japanese Garden Member tour this weekend, we want to renew our membership and can do it while we are there. ALSO, one of my pet objects of enjoyment, besides fire hydrants (I've loved them since I was a kid!) is ishidoro, or Japanese stone lanterns. The garden has a guided tour of them in April, and I am definitely signing up. (<lj user="synthcat">? $15 for nonmembers!)
DLJ gets his first paycheck at the end of the week. He gets paid monthly, but he can take a draw from it early, so it will be every two weeks. That will start two weeks from now, so his first check is a month. Most of it goes into savings, with a little to the house fund to start ramping up for the next property tax installment, and the rest to the regular account for bills and things. By the end of March we should be entirely caught up with all our goals, having paid even ourselves back for the money taken out late summer to throw at the debt, restoring our savings to the level it was at in July. I still get annoyed at this; I think what the money we have eradicated the debt with could have been used for, most of it investment purposes and future planning. Sure, we are caught up, but we could have been closer to some of our short term and longer term goals. It's a me/him thing, sadly, since I didn't "benefit" from any of this spending, for me it was a complete loss. I still think of some things as me vs. him, which isn't very good, marriage wise.
I really should just have a kid already, I bet it will knock the me importance right out.
But back to reality, it was a lesson for me too, as I had a part to play in the situations that were created that caused him to spend to feel better. Consumer therapy right in front of me! It's only money, though. In the grand scheme of things, it wasn't that much, and the more important thing is that we are communicating better, spending more thoughtfully, and working out the issues in our relationship that spurred this slow burn over the past couple years. It's a negative, but I have to turn my relationship to it positive, or it will still eat at me with mild resentment.
Bah! I forgot to bring my two checks to deposit today. Sorry, <lj user="athenais">. I SUCK. I will do it tomorrow.
I'm rambling. This is clearly a "processing" entry.


For those of you who have been looking to get an ipod, Apple just released new versions of them, and also some discount pricing on them as well.

Mine is still trucking, 20 months and the battery still seems to be ok.

DSL went down last night so I spent my time petting Ankimo, reading, eating leftovers and finishing a necklace for someone. I took photos and sent them, so, hopefully she will like it. I have another one to make for a friend's friend, and a sculpture to mess around with. So much glass, so little time!

The crocuses are going nuts now in the backyard, and in the metal planter pot. I need to make some slug traps. There were VERY cute ones at the garden show, they looked like mushrooms, but I can make ones myself.

It's still clear and sunny here. Where is that rain?

I've been doing much thinking these past months. Life is really improving for me. I'm trying very hard to not worry about things that previously weighed me down with potential hazard, now I try to wait until something is a challenge to work with, instead of spending stress and energy on things that only live in my mind. In short, less mountains from molehills, and waiting to come to bridges to cross them. And I did achieve some victory with that at the end of 2004, beginning of 2005. There's still miles and years to go, but I got a little better at it. As these thoughts and worries still arrive, often, I try to look at them gently, along with the other old habits I have in thinking that still surface. Acknowledge them, but not let them have the power they did previously. It's a long road ahead, one that will be full of challenges as I work to better myself and my place in the world. But I've started to unlock the door to being happier, healthier and more content with this adventure that I have been given by being born. It's certainly not all wine and roses, but it's often full of them, I am very blessed with love and close, good friends here, as well as the chance to rethink everything, which I am doing, and planning for the direction of the future I want to take. While I cannot truly hold the reins to my world, I can try to guide them, but also be open to what just comes my way. I am a very lucky person to have the support network of friends and family that I do, and I appreciate that. A large section of folks who read me know me in person, and I thank you for being around and listening. Those who I don't know, same deal…and I wish perhaps we knew each other more closely, so that we could better understand each other, for words can only go so far and are often full of dark pockets and hazy meaning.

Ok, that work thing calls.


I am back from the daily walk. The tree I stopped at last week, where I searched the branches for buds has bloomed. It, and the three like it grouped nearby, fizzed pink as I turned the corner to the back field. Spring! It feels a little early, but some of the plants, including my crocuses, seem to think it's time. Yesterday afternoon as I looked over the beginning results of last fall's bud planting, a fat bumblebee came exploring the new flowers as well. Yay!

From the SF Chron

*edit* 1pm: here's a link to offset the "bad" news I was mired in for the first couple paragraphs. Stuff you can DO about it! =)


"Northern Californians buy more cars
Sales increase of 9.4% beats other regions — industry economist credits wealth effect"

Gross. I've been reading <i>Affluenza</i> and it's hard to stay positive, with so many folks basing the quality of their lives on things, the ability to buy things, and working to make money with the goal of being able to buy things. Ew. For the umpteenth time, so GLAD to be out of California.

I just hope America figures it out before other developing nations are deeply entrenched in emulating what they see on TV, and what we've done as a nation. Hopefully they can bypass the greedy, consuming, SUV-gotta-have-it-damn-the-resources, gimme-my-coffee-screw-the-birds-gone-due-to-coffee-plantations, give-me-my-gold-ring-who-cares-about-mining-waste pit so much of America has become.

One person can make a difference. Especially when each one meets others and the numbers grow. Don't give up. I'm not going to. Not give up on myself when I sputter and lapse, buy try to get on track again. Buying things is ok, with care, education, and thought. Support non-mass production when I can, not taking the "cheap" route when I can support environmental practices and small biz for a few more dollars. Our copper fire pit will cost about $20 more, but it will be all recycled copper, no new mining, only reusing. Next step is to maintain compassion for those stuck in the consumer cycle. Not to look upon those buying up land and building huge houses, 4000k sq foot that they don't need with disdain, but with love. Not to shun my coworkers when they buy that next Cadillac Escalade. I'll smile, state why I drive a small car, and end it at that. Release the seeds and not worry about where they fall. And try to love along the way.

A good, long weekend

I don't think I have the energy to write it out! The yard, garden and patio show, coffee and discussing art,
sunny days, time to sleep and read…and then last night, going to the Edgefield. We had a KICK ASS room. Seriously. The building has two wings that jut out front, one on either side, and we were on the top floor at the end of the wing, with a huge room, big windows and a wonderful tree painted up the sloped sides of the wall near the bed. Dinner was included in the price, and I had a wonderful dish of diver scallops sauced in apple brandy, with wilted spinach. Guh.
Dessert was chocolate cake,and DLJ got a creme brulee and we shared. We went back upstairs for some naughty Valentine's Day fun, then wandered back out, looking at all the sculptures, lights, and fun things that make a McMenamins' so fun. At midnight we could be found in the distillery bar, me sipping a heated pear brandy and feeling positively…er…relaxed.
Breakfast was yummy too, brie and mushroom omelete for me, porter wheat flapjacks for DLJ. We left after wandering around in the daylight, and wow do we want to come back when it's warm out. There were folks out there playing golf at 10 am! Brrrrr. We stopped in the Hawthorne district for a fresh sheet of spinach pasta, cut to fettucini for us, some white truffle olive oil and parmesan cheese. We sidewalked shopped after that, and returned home by a little after noon. I played with some glass, DLJ cleared out some stuff in the backyard. We yanked the crap out of more ivy yesterday. I have a photo of that I need to upload. Still lots to go but smothering it in leaves over the winter definitely helped weaken it. It sure looks ugly right now, but it's progress towards the goal of removing it entirely.
Time to rest, read, and relax.

a good time was had…

…but why did it have to be THIS week it was my sis-in-law's gay episode of the Simpsons, while we were gone?

My father-in-law wasn't too happy she directed that one. HAHA.

Guess I'll have to wait till summer reruns.

Rest not in peace, good Doctor

sigh. Hunter's demise weighs heavy, more than usual for folks I haven't met. His words have definitely been friends through the years.
I'll still toast you on our shared birthday, man, like I always have. But it will be a sadder day knowing you aren't out there partying hard.