In the present

I made some beads last night that turned out fine. One didn’t do what I wanted. My abilities with metallic colors are shaky, not in actually getting the metals to come out, but to get them to stay once I put the bead in the kiln. Sometimes it stays, sometimes it does not. When it doesn’t, it just looks…blah. My blue metallic, for example, just stays a clear blue, not transforming into metallic blue goodness. I want the shiny!

Luckily, if I can’t figure out the mystery by December I am signed up for an intermediate bead class, where one subject is indeed using the metallic luster colors.

When I get home today I just put everything in a bag that I already laid out, make sure the kitties have good food and water levels, that the studio is shut down and then wait for DLJ. Hopefully he will get all his stuff ready quickly. I am always ready for trips first, I lay things out and pack early, so that when it’s time to go we can just go. I think for me this is one of those “marriage things” where you drive each other crazy, my wanting to leave on time and get going, and being ready ahead of time, when he usually is not. I sit around staring at the clock anxious to get going and irritated that things weren’t all prepacked before it was actually time to go.

Anyway, eventually we will get in the car and drive to Seattle, stopping for quick food on the way somewhere. Maybe I will just eat a Clif Bar. The weekend is full! Tomorrow we are seeing a bunch of friends during the day, folks I haven’t seen for months or years, or ever, depending. Two are former coworkers, one is a fellow online journalist that I’ve “known” for years, and maybe a recent aquaintance, a fellow lampworker, if the stars align. Then, Dead Can Dance! Then, Sunday, brunch with Horticultural Man, then seeing his home and hanging out. He does have a vine already potted up for us to take back home with us. Then home and I start my pre-packing for Tokyo. ;)

I worry about financial things and there’s nothing I can do about it. Stuff needs to get resolved. If it doesn’t, then we live the life of monks when we return from Japan. This doesn’t bother me, really. In the past year I have let go of so many wants, and perceived needs. Give me glass to work with and food, clothes to wear…and beyond that I don’t want much anymore. Just the ability to pay my bills and be comfortable and have DLJ with me. So the bite won’t bite me as hard as DLJ, probably. And he has some expensive dental work coming up. As it has been for a long time. I could go into how much easier it would have been to take care of it all this entire past year while for the most part, we both were working and the end of my contract wasn’t looming…but why bother. It’s the past, and how things are now are what we live with.

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