Off duty

Changed the look of the blog for Fall.
DLJ is downstairs with Derek. My Mom left today to go back to Arizona, it’s amazing how the time has gone. I remember the day they arrived in Oregon, and thinking, when they go home, I will have a baby! And here I am on the other end of that.

Derek is a really good baby. He fusses, all babies do, but so far, no colic, he’s usually pretty happy, and when not, we are getting better at figuring out why. All the stuff I thought I wouldn’t be able to sort out, I am starting to. I know when he’s pooping (it’s kinda cute actually, the look of concern he gets, and the zen face he has when he’s done), DLJ can tell when he’s peed. We usually can calm him down with some whooshing noise, swaddling, and jiggling him on our knee.

Getting up in the night is hard; but I sort of enjoy sitting with him in the dim light looking out the window at the blackness. When I am not so tired I am falling over, that is.

During the day I watch the leaves fall and think about the coming chilly weather. It’s fun to take him out in the Moby, I can do longer walks now and we have the thing down in terms of getting him in it. Even DLJ took a try and looked so cute carrying his son around.

Not all is perfect  here, the hospital bills are bad and I am not sure how we will get to the other side of all the financial things right now. I know we will, but I am one of those “always pay in cash” people, so any sort of debt drives me crazy, and add that to my hormones and any finance tension is very difficult for me right now. I am very bad at asking for help from friends and family, and worse at accepting it unasked; like somehow I am a failure for not being able to dole out several thousand dollars right NOW to pay the bills.

I take it to an extreme, and I know it, but I would rather stress on this side than stress on the side of owing money everywhere and living above my means. Usually, we don’t, but until the hospital bills, property taxes, and 2007 income tax are figured out, it’s going to be hard on my pride.  One step at a time, I know. And cut myself some slack, since I just had major surgery, my body is still going a little nuts (I have lost 30 pounds in the past month), hormones are crazy and  Derek and I are learning about each other, and DLJ and I are trying to help each other out and still get a little alone time in the process. He’s a great Dad. I’d love an hour or so just to snuggle up with him, maybe when Derek goes to sleep next. :p

Our boy.

7 thoughts on “Off duty

  1. Derek is so cute….I wish we nearby so we could come round and meet him – we have to have a “virtual” meeting very soon!!
    I’m sure you’ll get through the finance stuff ok, I sometimes forget how lucky we are living in a country with a free health service for everyone no questions asked.
    Loads of love to you, DLJ and Derek

  2. It’s boggling what the price is without health insurance. I am so glad we have it, even if it didn’t exactly cover everything as well as we had hoped.

    Everything has a flip side. You guys have free health coverage, but I know of folks who waited months to get cancer removed, because of the waiting lists and how long it takes to get seen sometimes.

    Someday, we all shall share a glass of wine in the flesh, us, you, and all our collective kids. =)

  3. Lookit you, Momma, such a beautiful boy! He has your eyes, I think. I am glad to hear that all is well with everyone, even if the bills are scary. It is amazing what is covered and what isn’t.

    Enjoy getting to know your little boy – what a precious time. We will talk soon!

  4. He is definitely a cute boy! Enjoy this time with him as they do grow up fast. My son is already 16 months old, and I can’t believe how big he is.

  5. What a beautiful boy – and a great photo. I hope I get to meet him before he’s graduating high school!

    What a joy to watch as you guys all take this journey together. If you ever need a babysitter… in Maryland… ;)

  6. I was just sitting here when it hit me, hard. We are BOTH MOMs. BOTH WIVES. What the heck? You have this beautiful new baby boy. I have this sunny little girl (who will be two very soon- YIKES!)

    Wow for us, huh?? Who could have guessed it, ten years ago, when we were pounding away on our latest entries, wondering what the next day would hold?

  7. pretty amazing….and I still have my noise machine with the lights, Derek loves the white noise and ocean settings! =)

    I still think of you when I hear Angun, too. =)

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